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Post by isthisamo on Aug 25, 2023 14:08:00 GMT
if i had muh druthers i think i'd rather just be full on ai! maybe there is a choice once you die and you're in the afterlife selection lobby or whatever. yeah. i don't know that i need any more extra humanyness. feel like i'm getting my fill of that now. tbh. ok sir. let me just ... *:users: on their ai death lobby computer thing* ah. ok. it looks like you only qualify for our lowest model ai crate box so... we'll need you to move along into that long slow line of shmucks over there...
i'm never moving again! QUICKLY SELF!@# HOP TO IT!@# *dad left hours ago* bigtime. actually. i believe dad or maybe both of them were just like. ID IZ FER R TUXES! :B but i guess i dun know for sure. as good a place as any i suppose. i don't know wtf i'm gonna get now! i don't know how it couldn't be! we've brought ALL our negotiating skills HARD!!
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Post by ditkanate on Sept 7, 2023 18:55:51 GMT
yeah. i don't know that i need any more extra humanyness. feel like i'm getting my fill of that now. tbh. ok sir. let me just ... *:users: on their ai death lobby computer thing* ah. ok. it looks like you only qualify for our lowest model ai crate box so... we'll need you to move along into that long slow line of shmucks over there...
oh, sure! i bet the lowly crate box ai's have human fingers and shit in them too!@#$$#@ GOD DAMMIT!@$#$#@ what? nooo, brother! relax guy! take a rest! its totally fine over here, it's safe! come on! ;floet; *self writes all of this on a post it note and crates it* ;vernoog; ;dunno; i like how you're half heartedly offering the horrible van around already. hey, know how we got stuck with this horrific piece of shit? lemme know if any of ya'll is interested! DON'T ALL OF YOU JUMP ON IT AT ONCE!@$##@$$#@ how about "OOOHH!!@#" you know, however many letters of that will fit. not even sure what we're negotiating for at this point, but i will rest easy knowing that we are going to get it bigtime due to our vast and yee skills that we have hard brought!!@@#
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Post by isthisamo on Sept 8, 2023 13:27:15 GMT
oh, sure! i bet the lowly crate box ai's have human fingers and shit in them too!@#$$#@ GOD DAMMIT!@$#$#@ HERE YOU GO SIR! ENJOY YOUR ETERNAL BOX OF HORRIBLE FINGERS AND SHIT!
hmm? yes yes. that's right. you go in there. with the shit and fingers yes. take care now! bye bye then!
us to each other: :pst: i don't really even understand why they have these boxes?! :confused: :stinky: :horrible:
safe!! i wasn't even thinking about safety1@#!@ OMF!@#!@ *crawls under rock with maids and stuff* i feel like we've mentioned this before, but we sure got consistency!! OH! U LIKE BAD VEHICLES!?? PEOPLE WE HAS GOT UR COVERED!@#!@ WHOOOO!@#@!# me i guess. hello? DRV or DOV or whatever the hell you all are. yeah. so how many exclamation points can i put on my license plate? that's what i need to know. STAT!@ i guess that's me on the phone with them or something. can you call them? ;B exactly!@# this thing we're negotiating for. it's as good as gotten! and i'm sure whatever that thing is is super sweet. otherwise why would we have brought all this vastness to the table?! WE WOULDN'T!!!
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Post by ditkanate on Oct 12, 2023 3:24:08 GMT
HERE YOU GO SIR! ENJOY YOUR ETERNAL BOX OF HORRIBLE FINGERS AND SHIT!
hmm? yes yes. that's right. you go in there. with the shit and fingers yes. take care now! bye bye then! us to each other: :pst: i don't really even understand why they have these boxes?! :confused: :stinky: :horrible:
jeez i wish the fingers were at least useful instead of just rolling around loose in this box my ai self is in!!@#$@#$ bro relax i said! take a rest! its so safe and wonderful over here you don't even NEED maids or rocks! ;floet; it does seem like where many of our tips and notes and problems and discussions end up, yes. but! at least once they're crated we can consider them done. we're swimming in bad vehicles baby!@#@#$ i guess that's u. i only like bad vehicles for the tax writeoff when i give them to homeless people. not sure, but i doubt it. i think you have to go down there and take a number and wait in line for quite a while and then go up to the window when you're number is called and then ask that person your question about the exclamation points. BROTHER I AM ENJOYING THIS NEGOTIATING VICTORY! A LOT! yup, just sitting here totally enjoying and using this thing. that we got.
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Post by isthisamo on Oct 17, 2023 13:09:33 GMT
jeez i wish the fingers were at least useful instead of just rolling around loose in this box my ai self is in!!@#$@#$ that would be better. yes sir. almost anything would be better than this. almost. :suspicous: *comes out* gets pounded bigtime* it's nice to consider them that way. we ARE swimming in them! or, we are if that's what you want! i can conjure up a bad vehicle pool like THAT! *snaps* i suppose the homeless tax rightoff is one of them main perks. NUMBER 437!!
*triumphantly heads to the horrible lady at the counter confident she is going to help me out BIGTIME!* again, i don't know how it could be any other way. it's the only outcome that could have come, from this situation that we nailed. really. in this eh, office we're in.
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Post by ditkanate on Nov 21, 2023 21:27:34 GMT
that would be better. yes sir. almost anything would be better than this. almost. but usually we go from bad to worse so i'll just be a content little ai self in my box of loose fingers. heh, and you thought things would be worse! but instead you get sweet heavenly poundings! i wouldn't have it any other way the main perks of homeless people? very true. they may be useless and horrific in every way imaginable, but at least when i give them shit i don't want anymore i get a sweet writeoff! horrible lady: may i help you yes yes i'd like to know how many exclamation points i can put on my vanity plate!!@$#$#@@#$ ;hjyper;;; horrible lady: *frowns and points at the counter next to hers* there is a sign above it that says "questions about vanity plate punctuation - take a number" oohhh we negotiated something fancy if we're in an office! ;hyp;er ;use;
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Post by isthisamo on Nov 28, 2023 13:21:12 GMT
but usually we go from bad to worse so i'll just be a content little ai self in my box of loose fingers. if there is one thing we've proved beyond any shadow of any doubt whatsoever is that the grass is in fact NOT greener on the other side! no sir! they don't even fucking have grass! i didn't understand the nature of the poundings i was getting. that's good since you can't. :whew: i think that's contentedness. yes sir! that was good thinking for the government to give them value. otherwise they had zero! well, i have to say, this one is on us! the sign was right there!
*smacks forehead* *grabs number* *sits*
an hr later: SORRY FOLKS! WE'RE CLOSING UP! COME BACK IN 4 DAYS! TIA! wow! things are looking up! and they were already way up!@# :highfive:
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Post by ditkanate on Dec 20, 2023 19:20:53 GMT
if there is one thing we've proved beyond any shadow of any doubt whatsoever is that the grass is in fact NOT greener on the other side! no sir! they don't even fucking have grass! *we switch boxen* HAY! I AM NOT POSITIVE THAT ALL OF THESE ARE FINGERS!!!@#@# sweet and heavenly? that sounds nice. i wouldn't have it any way that i can't have it. reminds me of some of our sweet homeless ideas we've had over the years. one of the recent natelands they were saying we should send all the homeless people out looking for bigfoot and the loch ness monster and stuff! THEY'RE JUST SITTING AROUND! PUT THEM TO GOOD USE!!@ ;usehaid; *comes back 4 days later* *sits a few more hours* SORRY FOLKS! WE JUST RAN OUT OF PLATES! COME BACK IN 4 WEEKS! TIA! i wonder if what we are describing is literally our lives rn. cuz i am totally typing in an office BIGTIME!!@$#$@# ;suspicious;
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Post by isthisamo on Dec 23, 2023 7:04:54 GMT
*we switch boxen* HAY! I AM NOT POSITIVE THAT ALL OF THESE ARE FINGERS!!!@#@# *we're in a box with 6 spider legs* *maybe we figure out that's what they are* WTF! WHERE'S THE OTHER 2!!?? :scared: well, yeah! it does! it doesn't matter what it is, if it's sweet and heavenly, it's good! that's how words work! :stuburn: it's like u are describing matt. except for regarding his wife. which is 90% of his life. but otherwise it's bae. good idea! this reminds ME of seinfeld where newman and kramer want to have the homeless pull rickshaws! :hyper: basically, nothing could go wrong with these ideas of putting homeless to work. one thing they're known for is their can-do get shit down attitudes! *sitting with number amongst tons of horrible people 4 weeks later* :chineyebrow: :B that makes the most sense! it's what we know. what's weirdest is that we didn't realize it! *types up exactly what is happening to us at this time* *reads it with surprise* :B
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Post by ditkanate on Jan 9, 2024 12:32:02 GMT
*we're in a box with 6 spider legs* *maybe we figure out that's what they are* WTF! WHERE'S THE OTHER 2!!?? :scared: *afraid to look down* this flaying alive is sweet and heavenly! huh, still works! ;dunno; ahh the wife. can i have her ANY other way? no? damn. matt. OHWELLTIMETOGOBEINDY!!@# ***KAPOWWWWW*** exactly! they can get shit down just about anywhere! usually sidewalks, but you know, they could shit in the bigfoot woods too. eye shur howpe thay haz enuf playtz too dae. :B brother! what we just typed up is truly uncanny!!
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Post by isthisamo on Jan 11, 2024 1:04:45 GMT
*struts arounf in box looking straight* AS FAR AS I KNOW I HAS REGULAR OL LEGS! :stuburn: i was really worried about this sweet heavenly torture, but it's surprisingly not so bad!
also, i feel like matt's wife is like an example of a succubus. but then when she snagged matt, the joke was on her!
succubus: WTF kind of a man is this?! :snooked: that's a good point. i can't think of any other group that would be good at shitting anywhere in any circumstance than homeless. well! i imagine they do not! brother! it's like we typed out exactly what we were thinking!@!
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Post by ditkanate on Mar 15, 2024 3:11:20 GMT
*struts arounf in box looking straight* AS FAR AS I KNOW I HAS REGULAR OL LEGS! :stuburn: EXACTLY!@# WHY WOULDN'T THEY BE REGULAR ANYWAY i shout as straight forwardly looking as humanly possible. *my body skitters arounf the box a bit* *still stare straight ahead* i mean if ur gonna be tortured you should hope for the sweet heavenly kind!! GAH!@# WTF AM I SUCKIBUSSING!@#$@#$@#$ FFS!@@#$@#$ AHHHHFHGFHGFHFH@##$#$% its like he's a succubus antidote! or poison. i dunno one of those. anyway the relationship is a draw. neither of them get anything remotely close to what they want! or happiness obvs. WE SHIT ALL OVER! ITS CUZ OF THE NO HOMES THING!! i guess that is homeless explaining all the shitting. brother! i am sitting at my home desk rn typing up exactly what I'M thinking! THIS IF FKN SPOOKY!@#$@#$@
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Post by isthisamo on Apr 13, 2024 3:47:41 GMT
EXACTLY!@# WHY WOULDN'T THEY BE REGULAR ANYWAY i shout as straight forwardly looking as humanly possible. *my body skitters arounf the box a bit* *still stare straight ahead* man! i move kick ass now! *straight stare* some sort of weird pillow torture i guess. and clouds. HALP! STEP THET! I'LL TALK! I'LL TALK! i guess. is that what they want? it's like the succubus took a sip of beer at a party but it was someone's spit cup. but even worse cuz for some reason then you still have to keep sucking it for a long time and have kids with it and stuff. the kids are only barely better than the spit-cup.
no offense matt and family. i have a lot of not bathroom shitting experience! OK homeless dave! we got it!@ 🙄 man. i guess we have like sixth senses or something.
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